Kim Osorio's Blog

Hey, go to my girls’ site, www.missinfo.tv and count how many times Ghostface says “whatever whatever” in the interview. He’s doing a song-by-song tour of his album The Big Doe Rehab (what the hell does that mean? I love it.) which comes out this Tuesday. Every time he can’t finish a sentence, he says “whatever whatever” and I would like to know how many “whatevers” constitute an official answer to the question.

To “entendre” or not to “entendre,” that is Jay-Z’s question. ‘Twas once a skillful clever wordsmith, whose unpredictable witty lyrics earned him praise and accolades, has become a victim of the spoken phrase with double meaning, spewing words now twisted up in the tangled web we weave.

I remember when I first heard the phrase. Freshman English class. And it has now resurfaced in the rhymes of the Almighty Hov-er and over again in the past year and a half. Alas, my ears tire. But in his overuse of the double entendre, is he attempting to educate a generation of Freshman class cutters who shant even show up to class to learn prose in proper context or merely stressing his newfound love of literature.

Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer, the slings and arrows of hooked on phonics. Ah, To Rap. To Sleep. For in that sleep of rap, what yawns may come.

(Does anyone care that I didn’t write this down at first? I don’t write it down! Aw shiznit, i’m a genius. Did you read what I wrote? Did you hear what I said? Isn’t this annoying? Are you getting the point?)

I read somewhere that Fabolous had a birthday party last week. Reportedly, he turned 30. Hmmmm. I swore I read something last year where he claimed to be 25. If Fab is 30, then how old is everyone else? Are there any rappers besides Soulja Boy, Bow Wow and Lil’ Wayne who are still in their 20s?

Like any fan, I need to be entertained, and things are way too bland and serious these days. Here are a few things I’d like to see happen before the year comes to an end. Here’s my Christmas wish list.

• Another R. Kelly beef. Ne-Yo just teased us with his interviews when he got kicked off the tour (Read), but I’m really starting to feel like R. Kelly is a bigger diva than them all. Any time there is some sort of R. Kelly drama, it’s classic. I wanna re-live the pepper spray moment.
•  Beyonce leaves Jay-Z. I feel like Beyonce has waited long enough for a damn ring. And if she has it and is hiding it, then that doesn’t count. Would love to see her flee for like a Chris Brown or Bow Wow to keep herself in the under 30 club. (no, i don’t believe she is under 30).
•  A Janet and Jermaine Dupri sex tape. Just imagine how interesting this would be when Janet whips out a boob in the bedroom.
•  A full album of Lil’ Wayne… singing. You know it’s coming, so why doesn’t he just spare us the wait and start belting out the vocals.
• Diddy and His Kids Reality Show – You can go ahead and say that you enjoy Run’s house and Irv Gotti’s show, but in this day and age, I can’t bear to watch anything that resembles a modern day Cosby show or Family Ties. It’s 2007 and none of the families on TV are a match for a mogul with 3 baby mamas, no wife, a hot temper and an ego.
•  A presidential pardon for T.I.  People are really criticizing T.I. for his recent arrest. I don’t know how he’s gonna get out of this one, so I’m asking anyone with the power to release him. We need ATL: the Sequel. Free T.I.! Too bad I don’t manufacture t-shirts.

 I’m not finished yet. but you can help me.

This just in….Okay, not really. Can you guess that I’m being sarcastic, yet? Why is everyone reporting on Nas pushing his upcoming album, N***er, back a few months. You didn’t really think he was going to put it out in December, did you? C’mon, when Jay-Z decided to drop his CD American Gangster in November that pretty much should have told you right there that there would be no Nas album. Well, I guess I’ll get back to the news which is that it isn’t coming until February.

And by the way, check the Nas and Jay picture from their Apollo show a few weeks ago. Is it me or is their newfound friendship where they have to join each other on stage getting a little played?? It’s screaming publicity stunt, and I miss hearing “Takeover” and “Ether.” I’m gonna go play them now.

So Star and Bucwild are returning to the NYC airwaves in January on a new station 87.7. I got the scoop and did an article on it. Read.

If you haven’t already checked out our Hip-Hop Vs. America Blog on BET.com, then please do. Not just because I work there, but because Beans sort kinda dissed T.I. and I love the drama. I think Beanie Sigel is the only rapper allowed to dis whoever he wants. I have no objections. I’m very convinced that he is bout it. My only question is in reference to the picture above. How will he run from police with all that extra weight on him? I shouldn’t have said that. Now, I’m scared.

This is the beginnings of my very own blog. I’m about two years too late, but hey, I’ve been busy. If you’re wondering why my shit looks like a resume, it’s because I’m not a fuckin’ designer…so there. Come back, cuz when I finish setting this up, I’ll be back to my usual sarcastic, shit-talkin’, opinionated reporting on all things Hip-Hop and then some.